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Today was different
Ten years. For more than ten years, every MRI has come with the same expectation: finding something. A new tumor. A growing tumor. A reason to schedule another surgery. MRI follow-up appointments have almost always meant planning the next surgery, figuring out when I can take time off work, and asking, “How much longer can…
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Refreshing MyChart
I have never been as nervous for college exams as I am for an MRI. The night before a scan, sleep is usually out of the question. Partly because I’m anxious and partly because my brain suddenly decides now is the perfect time to imagine every possible outcome. The Ironic part is that by the…
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Piss Bags
Chronic illness slowly turns bizarre things into a routine. Like when I had a catheter and a kidney drain in for a month. I was walking about with a bag of piss strapped to my leg. Yes it was warm. During those four weeks I became weirdly strategic about outfits. Wide leg pants weren’t just…
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Tiny Cup Chronicles
A life changing diagnosis like kidney cancer isn’t just one big dramatic moment. It is also weird and humiliating little moments all pilled together to create one unbelievably absurd story. I think, over my lifetime, I have peed in about 100 different cups. I guess I don’t have any advice on how to get the…
Beyond The Chart 